The unexamined minds
I dont understand most people these days. The truth is everyone wants to tell you what your report card is. I am always looking for why my report card is the way it is.
I have never had a job where i pursued my curiosity. Curiosity is not something we value at work. At work we value doing what the boss said to do. The failure to achieve the right answer is always our fault. The boss is always disappointment. in our inability to understand what they were feeling that we should be able to do.
when you are naturally curious then most of your life is an exercise in humility. you basically learn why something you thought was x turned out to be y and then you realize:
omg is this what makes z happen??
then you go into a spiral-
oh no! i told everyone it was x, but now i must go back and tell EVERYONE its actually y so i can THEN explain the significance of z and we can all celebrate how dumb i was before and what great achievement i made now.
in the modern world, very few ppl even wanted to understand x. so u end up really mad that no one cares you were stupid before- so no one wants to know y u r smart now.
this is my challenge with modern communication and its breakdown. its all one way. someone like me has no problem being wrong- infact i love being wrong. because then i can learn something new. but everyone now telling us that we are wrong has no self reflection to even begin to understand why. so they cant tell anyone.
this is a deflection of the unexamined self.
the unexamined self is always very certain about their ideas. they always have certainty. the more you ask them why, the more you are at fault by some natural predisposition. so i must be fundamentally immoral as i am brown.
why?
all brown ppl are.
why?
because god said so
who is god?
fuck u atheist
i am not concerned with the emotional issues. these people do not leave an emotional mark. done cannot be crying every time a child says they hate you when you dont let them have dessert for breakfast. that is not a statement about you, that is their lack of understanding manifesting in a limited vocabulary.
i just find the conversation boring. why would you engage in a conversation if you did not want to learn something? if you wanted to fight, then take up a martial art?
it seems a futile endeavor to preach, when you cannot teach. and why would you want to teach when there is so much more to learn.
the most jarring moment of my life was when i entered a classroom and walked to the front to teach. as i looked upon 11 students eager to learn, i thought it was a sorry world where i was the professor. i had no idea what i know that was worth their time. in addition, i wished i was in a familiar spot sitting next to them taking notes.
i dont relate to people who want everyone to listen to them. i prefer not talking so i can understand what i am learning. the world is filled with so much unexamined mystery that i feel sorry for people who cannot live in the awe of finding themselves wrong all the time.
why be right and stagnant, when you can be wrong and move with the tide?
